The Canvas Grey

Inspiration, Perspective, Insight


Posted by TheCanvasGrey on May 11, 2007


My conclusions and my lessons learned! 

I’m two weeks out of the hospital and doing great; not 100% just yet but considering all that happened…GREAT! I’ll not share the boring details of what happened other than to say I was well taken care of by the nurses.  Nurses really are angels on earth!  They sat with me through the blood transfusion and took care of me when I couldn’t take care of myself.  Absolute ANGELS!  

There are so many things I want to share so that you or those you know may benefit from my experience.  Having been relatively healthy most of my life I learned many things about my body, my mind and my spirit. First I’d like to speak to my complete and sincere thankfulness; no matter who or where you are, things can ALWAYS be worse.  I thank GOD for the incredible things we know about and don’t know about in this life.  He has so delicately and ingeniously intertwined us and binds us. God is so much more than anything or anyone can imagine.  I thank the wonderful doctors and nurses who were there for me when my family and friends couldn’t be; they are the get ‘er done people!  I thank my dear, dear family and friends for their love, support and their willingness to intercede in my behalf. 

Several of my family and friends have been profoundly affected by my journey; surprisingly so.  I guess it hit home that we are all human and will die, some sooner than others.  I never knew who really cared about me until this time in my life.  It renewed my marriage in a way I can’t explain. I am so grateful for all the experience and knowledge this life changing event has exposed me to and it to me.  I’ve also been unpleasantly surprised as to those who I thought were my dearest friends ended up being just that; they were dear to me, not I to them.  The care and love I so eagerly showered wasn’t returned to me in my time of need and I grieve for them.  They have lost something significant.  

Some things I must just accept in faith that they are what I believed them to be.  Because no one human can explain them; I guess I must accept they are of God or miracles or things yet not explained.  From my experience I accept with faith that lines were crossed beyond religious beliefs.  God is so much more than any religion can put into words.  I accept in faith that maybe it isn’t how we worship or pray or believe, it is the coming together of our spirits, our hearts, and our minds.  Ok sci-fi fans, NOT like borgs ***cheap laugh*** LIKE the SPIRITUAL BEINGS THAT WE ARE!  No one religion, belief, way of prayer or thought better than another; FOCUSED on each other for the sake of good, caring, hope, faith, love.  I’m in NO WAY trying to bottle up God.  To me, He is so much more than we can fathom; look at the stars in the sky or listen to a child laugh.  It has renewed my faith in this wonderful life experience and made it even more precious than it was before because I don’t (and shouldn’t) expect anymore than I’m lucky to get.  It has strengthened my resolve to learn, share, understand and care for others in a way I haven’t since I was a child.  And I fear no more because I’m loved, blessed and cherished. 

Now as for those miracles; those questionable wonderings I’ve had about my ER trip and dreams, etc.  We generally aren’t looking for miracles on a daily basis.  We have no idea how CLOSE that car was because we never saw it.  Or how we were healed from something we didn’t even know we had.  And my conclusion is that miracles are all around us because someone is (was, will be) praying, thinking about us or connecting with us spiritually in some way.  Others are placing us in God’s crosshairs for miracles whether we know it or not. 

I realized that miracles ARE ALIVE…whether you see them or not!  


The most important thing I learned is that NO ONE cares about YOU, like YOU DO!!!  Have your medical history written down.  Take it with you whenever you go to the doctor, hospital.  Carry a copy to give if needed.  Don’t assume that things about you have been shared from one doctor to another correctly.  ALWAYS SPEAK UP!  Everyone makes mistakes…two doctors did with me…they are human!  SPEAK UP!

Never wait for important records to be transferred from one location to another.  If possible, get the records, review them to make sure they are complete and hand them to the other party.  This is especially true when time is an important factor.  If I’d waited another two weeks they would have had to take more of my hip and there is already enough gone, thank you!   HA!

When something is found and testing begins, DON’T ASSUME you have what they are testing for!!!!  In my case, they were testing me for ovarian cancer because they must put something down as to the reason for the tests so insurance will cover the exams, etc.  So TRY not to sweat it until they TELL you what they have found to be true.  It is hard but really spare yourself some worry on that if you can!

Oh this is gross but I must share because I had no idea.  When given pain meds INSIST that you are given a stool softener too.  I ended up impacted because no one told me this or asked why I wasn’t taking one.  I truly hope this NEVER happens to you!  The only pain worse is child birth.  I KID YOU NOT!  My ONLY relief was to go fishing…yep…fishing for feces.  Don’t be afraid.  You can do it and the relief is quick and no trip to the hospital!  I NEVER would have done this if my sister hadn’t told me about Bobby doing this for Whitney on their reality show. ***BIG SIGH*** One redeeming tidbit of helpful information from a reality show…so sad that two gifted people ended up in that mess. 

Lastly, keep your eyes on the bills because you can get charged double for things.  Here again, humans, mistakes, double checking never hurt anyone and the money comes out of our pockets in the end no matter how you look at it! 

I sincerely wish you HEALTH!  Because it is up to YOU to be happy!!!!


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